Spiritual Synastry: Discover the inner dimension of your relationships.

Spiritual Synastry: Discover the inner dimension of your relationships.
by Christos Arcos M.sc
Astrologist, Psychologist, CBT therapist

The reason that sometimes Synastry techniques do not help us when we look at a romantic relationship is because we look at it as something with no purpose and with no specific meaning. We believe that the relationship was created in a spontaneous way and the most important of all we think that the mechanics of the relationship are very simple.
This is not something real.  We know that a relationship has also a developmental reason for its existence and by looking on its esoteric – inner nature we will be able not just to unlock the mysteries of the relationship but we will also be able to help the couple to succeed in solving the problems that will arise soon or later.

1st Step: Do we have something common to get along with in our voyage in life?
We should not overlook the importance of Moon Nodes when we are looking at a Synastry. The nodes will help us if the couple has common things to discover and to solve.
For example a person may have a square between his North Node and Venus. That means that the specific person will need to learn some important things about how to love, to share and his values. Also a reason of conflict with others will be in his life.
If he meets a woman with the North Node having any kind of aspect with Venus that means that they have some common ground. Both, as a part of their development they have to focus on Venus matters and they have to solve them. Now if she has a good aspect like a trine or a sextile between her Venus and the north Node that means that for the specific male this woman is very important because they do not have just the common developmental interests in Venus themes, but because the woman holds the good aspect she may be the one that will help him solve his problems on these specific matters.
So it is very important in a couple both people to have a common planet having any aspect with their personal North Node.
If both people have a negative aspect of the same planet with their North Node then the situation will be difficult and perhaps each person will create problems to each other. Especially when these planets are Pluto, Neptune, Uranus, Chiron and Eris we will have extreme problems.
It is positive when both of them have a planet that has a positive aspect with their personal North Nodes. It brings great joy and happiness when we meet this kind of persons in our life. There is a sense of tranquility and peacefulness but the lack of developmental needs and conflicts for growing, in many cases, it may lead the relationship to dullness.

2nd Step: Venus – Mars Aspects and Houses. The need for love and passion
It is very important to look at the aspects planet Venus has, because we can look at the love deposits of this relationship. Venus is the ruler of Gemini in the esoteric astrology and has to do with higher love – the love that connects people not because of simple passion but because of spiritual awareness.
When in a couple both of them have a Venus with a good aspect it is a very positive sign. Looking at which house each Venus falls on the other chart we can understand lots of the reasons a person comes in our life.
If for example we have a Venus of a Man Sextile with the Venus of a Woman and the Venus of the Man falls in the 4th house of the Woman’s natal chart this means that this Man comes to the life of this person to bring security and calmness. Perhaps this man holds an important meaning for her life. 4th house is always a very karmic house and many times it points that the couple has activated long bonds which go back to their past lives. Sometimes this is not a karmic bond but an “inheriting” one. That means that perhaps in the Woman’s family runs a family problem of security that goes through the ages, the man may be the key to the solution of her family situation.
We have to look very carefully which houses are activated through Venus because they bring a very important message to the people having a relationship. The houses that usually correspond to water element (4th – 8th – 12th) hold a very Karmic or even spiritual meaning that needs to be very clear from the astrologer to his client.  The fire houses (1st – 5th – 9th) are usually very powerful significators of strong bonds in the couple and help people to feel very good. Sometimes people support strongly each other and they have the ability to get over the biggest problems of all you can imagine.
Air houses (3rd – 7nth – 11nth) may be sometimes productive and they help  the communication to run easily but at the same time they are not very good at creating emotional ties, this means that a relationship is based more on mind than on spiritual ties. Finally the earth houses (2nd – 6th – 10th) are the worst because they are rooted in everyday things and sometimes the relationship does not have the proper abilities to go a step farther and to unite with its spiritual dimension. Especially in 6th house matters, perhaps there is a reason for one person to be in service for the other for some past mistakes.
The best aspects the Venus of the two people may have are the Trine and the Sextile. Squares may add some passion but people cannot be developed easily and on the opposition they may have great blockings, sometimes they may even act against their own love issues, like trying sabotage their mate. For that reason an astrologist has to go deeply inside the Venus identity and look for solutions but most of all of the reason these people are in conflict.
While Venus has to do with love in a spiritual dimension and a need for commitment, Mars has to do with the ability of a person to have a specific IDEAL for his or her relationship. So while in common astrology Mars has to do with sex impulses and sexual compatibility in the esoteric dimension it has to do about faith and ideals those persons have. When a couple has faith to each other lots of problems can be solved, on the other side the idealization or even sometimes the fanaticism about the relationship may lead to difficulties in everyday life and problems of freedom within the relationship. For this reason opposition should be avoided in a Synastry. Conjuction is usually the best aspect mars of a male and a female chart can have and the next one is the Square because it is a dynamic aspect and although they may have some conflicts but also it brings common ground for them to fight in life.
Mars works in the same way as Venus in the Houses.

3rd Step
The Sun – Moon eternal wedding
Sun and Moon are always very important planets in a Synastry, this is a fundamental truth both in traditional and spiritual Synastry.
In the dualistic world of Yin and Yang a good relationship may bring the TAO as the eastern religion understood it and that is the way of unity and joy. Having Sun and Moon in compatibility in a Synastry it is like having two people which are born to be together. When you have harmonious aspects between Sun – Sun, Moon – Moon and Sun – Moon of each other it is like holding the key of happiness. You will not find any natal charts combination of two people that will have all of the positive aspects, but when you have mostly Conjuncts, Trines and Sextiles the relationship is very strong and powerful.  Nature is within the relationship and connection is so natural that nothing can change it. Imagine of the flow of the water and its physical route, nothing can change this, even the most powerful human works fail in front of the power of nature. The relationship in this case holds within it the power of nature.
When the couple has detrimental aspects (especially Squares and Inconjucts) then it is like trying to go against the nature. The relationship is against the natural law, this does not mean that the relationship cannot survive, but you have to put a lot of energy and always there always will be the risk for destruction. Imagine the dams which people so willingly try to build and sometimes they fail to protect their cities, the same thing happens in a relationship which does not have positive aspects.
Another problem is when the Sun – Moon of 1 person does not have any aspects with Sun and Moon of the 2 person. This usually means that there is no spiritual meaning for the couple and if they get along (something very rare) they will not stay for a long time together but there are always exceptions.
Another important point to look at is where Sun and Moon fall in each ones Natal chart.
Usually the Fire houses are very constructive and positive while the water houses bring severe problems of expression especially when we talk about 8th and 12th houses. Air and Earth houses are neutral and they can be worked in a good or a bad way depending on the aspects the couple has on their Sun and Moon.

4th  Step
Vertex and Antivertex. Are you someone important for me?
If someone has has heavy influences in a Synastry combination from his planets to your vertex it is very important. Vertex is the point that helps us understand if someone is really important in our life and if he will change our life forever. Beware that this change may not be always for good, mayor changes can be bad too. This is a critical point in understanding the Vertex. For this reason we have to look closely which planets interfere with it because it is a very sensitive point. Usually Pluto, Saturn and Mars conjuct Vertex are bad luck aspects and the people having them in our Vertex are usually detrimental for us. On the Contrary Venus, Jupiter and Neptune are beneficial for our future.  Sun, Mercury, Moon, Uranus, Chiron and Eris need a lot of attention because the results may vary according to various factors.
It is better not to look at other aspects except conjuctions and oppositions because the significance of the meaning may not be so intense. Also in oppositions we usually find people that in the “past” helped us so we are the ones now that we have to help them to change their lives.

5th Step
Uranus – Neptune and Pluto: the Spiritual leaders
One planet from these ones will be more powerful than the other in the Synastry. The planet that has the greater influence is very important and gives us a lot of information about the situation and the goal of the specific relation we have.

URANUS AS A SIGNIFICATOR OF THE RELATIONSHIP
With Uranus the relationship needs to bring new elements to the couple’s life and to their surroundings. They are meant to help the people around them to become better and to destroy their old habits.
Destroying the past is one fundamental thing this relation needs to do even by itself. We usually see them as couples that work on a common goal while they are totally free and they do not suffocate each other. They have usually a common goal to succeed and their magnetism is very strong.
Uranus is a planet of freedom and joy, many couples with this planet work together to bring light to many other people.
Uranus is the Egg – Breaker, the egg is the natural world which holds us back and does not help us see the scientific truth. So Uranus needs to bring truth and clarity, the relations need to be clear and without the old “should” other relationships have.
If you are a very traditional person this planet may not be very helpful for you because it is against social standards. These relations need to go against everything it is accepted socially because they bring something new and fresh as an expression of love.
The danger this relation has is to become preoccupied with thought and to blockade the emotions to flourish, that’s why there is always the need those people to have a good conduct with their bodies working with their Saturn (Saturn is the ruler of the body).
Having a good and a healthy relationship with your body it will also help you to be ok with yourself. Thoughts are not always enough, emotional proximity and body acceptance of the other are great gifts that “brainy” Uranians may not value in the beginning and they need to work on them if they want to go a step farther.

NEPTUNE AS A SIGNIFICATOR OF THE RELATIONSHIP
Having Neptune as a significator it can be something very intriguing. Neptune is the planet most connected with higher love as was expressed by Jesus Christ. Relationships that hold this powerful planet as their significator are very important and they are really able to touch their spiritual dimension of their relationship. Neptune is a planet that really has to do with love without frontiers, our ideal love that stays eternal and shapes humans life forever.
It brings great joy and spiritual development. The couple usually through love and help for the other people develops itself.  Neptune corresponds to the 2nd Ray of esoteric astrology of Love and Wisdom (Huber). Those couples hold a very important role in the planet. You have to remember that those couples that hold a higher spiritual purpose they also share a high love bondage between them although  the reason they are together cannot be just for being together, they have usually a spiritual reason to fulfill and help others. They can be teachers to others and they can also be an example for people who are in need. They are the couples who help people in need and travel to various countries to do their best to populations threatened by war and starvation.
In their relationship they do not have the common problems other relations have because they mutually understand each other. The only problem which may arise is that giving too much giving to others it may lead them not to give attention to themselves and lose their conduct forgetting that their true power comes from their love they share.

PLUTO AS A SIGNIFICATOR OF THE RELATIONSHIP
The powerful Pluto as a significator of a relationship holds great gifts but also dangers. Pluto is the “WILL”, the ultimate power of human existence where all human abilities dwell. Those couples having Pluto as a significator understand themselves as one and they comprehend the world around them as a single unity in a spiritual environment and not as two separated monads in a world of chaos.
In the world they are destined to change rapidly important things about society. This change will be very strong and will show a new way to the people.  A Pluto relation is always a powerhouse of change and understanding for every aspect of life.
Its basic power is WILL, this means that these people have a strong will to succeed in their dreams. They are the people who can start from a simple office and run whole financial empires. Sometimes this zeal may lead them to their destruction; their attachment to earthly resources will lead them to lose their spiritual conduct. Sex may have an increased value and that probably will make them lose their balance. For this reason they must always have in mind that great power may lead to great destruction. Self destruction is always a problem of the developed Pluto Couple, there are moments that they cannot control their passion and they may ruin everything.
When they find their true balance they will understand that their power must be connected with love and this will help them not only to feel deeply in harmony with each other but also to serve their higher purpose in this planet.

6th Step
Mercury and inner communication
Mercury plays a significant role when we try to view a relationship through a spiritual dimension.
We know very well that communication in Mercury is become through speech but on relationships that work on a higher level becomes a spiritual – soul communication.  Sometimes in your life you may felt that a beloved person something happened to him and you were worried and you finally learnt that he was really having a serious problem. Also sometimes you may felt instantly what your partner was feeling and wanted to talk about it, so Mercury is more than a basic instrument. Is a great tool every people want especially when you want to transcend your relationship in a higher level.  Mercury also helps us to understand our place in the world and to put in a proper way all our daily work and needs in balance.
Relations, work, hobbies all of them through Mercury can be in perfect balance. So if two people have Mercury in Harmonious aspect it is very good because they have a very good interconnectedness and slowly they believe strongly to each other. Mercury is positive when it is found on each other’s air or earth houses. In fire it may be creative but not logical and in Water it may create emotional blockages.

7th Step
Jupiter and Saturn our Viewpoint and Karma
Jupiter is always a place of development and change. With a strong Jupiter in a relationship people are able not just to look in the future and have right choices but also to see the whole picture. Our present civilization is full of details and people usually get lost in them, Jupiter helps a relationship to look at the big picture and function in the proper way. When two people have Jupiter in a good relation they can share the same visions and targets, they can even use their plans for the profit not just for themselves but for the whole humanity. Jupiter needs to be in Water and Fire houses because it is an inspiration planet.
Saturn on the other hand is the lord of Karma it is the one that helps us look why the persons are met, Saturn with the Nodes are the two basic instruments we have to understand for knowing the reasons a relationship comes into life.
Hard aspects of Saturn lead to emotional stagnation and coldness. There can be even cruelty and disappointments. But we really want the presence of Saturn in positive aspects because it helps for the preservations and sustainment of the relation. Saturn is mostly positive in Earth and Air houses.

EPILOGUE
Each step will help us understand why a relationship exists, which are the main obstacles and most of all what its future prospects are. We have to look in planets with respect and not to interpret a relation in just sexual and attraction terms. Astrology is a tool that helps us to reach higher planes of existence. We should not be rooted in our past views and habits any more.